Beyond Burnout: How to Rebuild Resilience When You’re Tired of Being Strong
Are you tired of being resilient, exhausted from the pressure of holding it all together? In today’s culture of constant hustle and high performance, we often glorify resilience, but rarely talk about what happens when even resilience starts to wear thin. In recent months, many clients have confidentially shared with me that they feel overwhelmed, yet guilty for admitting they’re tired of always being the strong one.
If this is you, you feel emotionally depleted, mentally foggy, or like you’re “done being strong,” you’re not alone. This state has a name: resilience fatigue. And it’s quietly affecting high-performing professionals across every industry.
According to the American Psychological Association:
nearly 3 in 5 employees report feeling emotionally exhausted,
44% of workers say they’re experiencing burnout.
Even more revealing: only 35% of professionals say they feel “mentally well” at work (Gartner, 2023).
So what’s really happening? It’s not a lack of grit. It’s the weight of prolonged pressure with too few opportunities to recover. And it is important to find ways to recover, to take time off for you.
What Is Resilience Fatigue—Really?
Resilience fatigue happens when we’ve spent so long “powering through” stress or hardship that our emotional reserves run low. You might notice:
Increased irritability or emotional sensitivity
Trouble concentrating or sleeping
A sense of numbness or detachment
The desire to withdraw or shut down
It’s not failure, it’s feedback. It’s your body and mind’s way of saying: I need care too.
The New Model of Resilience: Grace + Grit
We often think of resilience as toughness. But the reality is that sustainable resilience is equal parts grit and grace—the ability to bounce back and the wisdom to rest, reflect, and realign.
Here are four evidence-based strategies to help you rebuild your resilience from the inside out:
1. Embrace Restorative Self-Compassion
Research by Dr. Kristin Neff shows that practicing self-compassion reduces anxiety, boosts motivation, and improves resilience. When you're tired of “holding it all together,”, remind yourself:
“It’s okay to pause. It’s okay to not have it all together. I’m doing the best I can.”
Action Step: Start your day with one compassionate affirmation or question: “What do I need today to feel supported?”
2. Replenish Your Emotional Reserves
Think of your resilience like a bank account. You can’t keep making withdrawals without deposits. This is where a personal coping toolbox comes in. Include:
Movement (walks, stretching, dance)
Mindful rituals (journaling, meditation)
Emotional outlets (talking to a friend, creative hobbies)
Nutrition + sleep as non-negotiables
Action Step: List your top 5 positive coping strategies. Post them where you’ll see them when overwhelm hits.
3. Set Strategic Boundaries
Many of us fall into the “helper” trap—saying yes when we’re running on empty, or when we really want to say no! But boundaries aren’t barriers, they’re bridges to sustainable leadership.
Research shows that professionals who set boundaries are less likely to experience chronic burnout and more likely to feel a sense of control and fulfillment (Harvard Business Review, 2023).
Action Step: Say “no” to one non-essential task this week. Notice how it feels. Use that clarity to recalibrate.
4. Practice Micro-Restoration Daily
You don’t need a weeklong retreat to recover. Even micro-rest moments (as short as 60 seconds) can regulate your nervous system and restore clarity.
Try:
60 seconds of deep breathing
Standing outside and noticing 3 things you see or hear
A moment of silence before your next meeting
Action Step: Set a phone alarm labeled “Pause for presence” 2–3x a day this week. Try it and adjust as needed.
The Bottom Line: You Don’t Have to Do It Alone
Resilience isn’t a solo act. It’s a practice—and sometimes, we need support to rebuild.
“The goal of living is to absorb all of the pain of life and lose none of the joy.” — my Mom
If you’re navigating tough times, remember: you can rise and rest. Strength and softness can coexist. Growth doesn’t require perfection—only intention.
Want support on your resilience journey?
Explore my self-paced course: Dare: To Rise Above Tough Times at BrunnerAcademy.com—designed to help you build clarity, confidence, and inner strength that lasts.
If you enjoyed this blog post, here are some other resources you might enjoy:
My book, "Dare To Own You: Taking Your Authenticity and Dreams Into Your Next Chapter": The winner of two Feathered Quill Book awards, and an Book Excellence award, and recommended by Forbes in 2022 as “a teaching memoir”.
My podcast, the "Live Your Best Life with Liz Brunner" podcast: An award-winning and internationally streamed show that highlights powerful stories of re-creation and reinvention from guests who have taken their life experiences, and used that knowledge to create their “next chapters” and live their best lives.
My work as a keynote speaker, executive coach and communication expert. You can read more about more of my services here.
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