Are You Building Success That Actually Means Something?

Written By Liz Brunner

Over the years, leadership has shaped me to set meaningful goals, explore new possibilities, and pursue growth with curiosity and dedication. Each step has been less about chasing achievement and more about discovering what's possible through steady effort and openness to change. That drive has influenced my journey, helping me build and walk away from a 28-year career in television, step into rooms I never imagined, interview extraordinary people, and ultimately create a business and body of work that keeps growing and evolving.

I am a striver, as Arthur Brooks would say, but I am also a seeker. I want to understand not just what I am building, but why. That distinction matters, because success and meaning are not always the same. You can have the title, the platform, the career, the recognition, the full calendar, and all the external signs of success, and still feel disconnected inside. You can be achieving more than ever and still wonder if the life you are building truly reflects the person you are becoming. That question is not a sign of failure. In fact, it may be one of the most important questions you can ask yourself.

Recently, I finished reading Arthur’s book, The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose in an Age of Emptiness, and so much of what he explores connected deeply with the work I do with leaders and the ideas I continue to write about. His book is about finding purpose and meaning in a world where those things can feel harder to access, and about reconnecting to the deeper “why” of your life. For me, that question is not separate from leadership. It is at the very center of it.

When Success Starts to Feel Disconnected

Many high performers are very good at building success. They know how to set goals, meet deadlines, earn promotions, prepare for presentations, lead teams, and do what needs to be done. From the outside, their lives may look impressive, and often they are. But at some point, many leaders realize that achievement alone is not enough. The milestone arrives, but the fulfillment fades faster than expected. The room gets bigger, the responsibility grows, the visibility increases, and yet something still feels unfinished.

I have seen this in my coaching work, and I have felt it in my own life. Sometimes, the very success you worked so hard to create starts asking of you something new:

  • Are you still aligned with it? 

  • If the version of success you are chasing still fits who you are now? 

  • If the achievement still means what it once did?

Those answers can be uncomfortable realizations, especially for those who have always been rewarded for striving. When you are used to achieving, it can feel disorienting to pause, but that pause is not weakness. It is awareness.

Arthur writes that finding the meaning of your life requires thinking differently. That idea stayed with me, because so much of leadership growth calls for the same shift. If we keep thinking in the same patterns, measuring success by the same old standards, and moving through life with the same assumptions, we may keep achieving without ever truly evolving.

For leaders, this matters because the next chapter is rarely built by repeating the mindset that created the last one. At some point, doing more, proving more, and achieving more cannot be the only definition of growth. The question has to go deeper than, “What is next?” It becomes, “What is this all for?”

Why Self-Knowledge Comes First

One line from Arthur’s book that resonated with me most was this: “You can’t know the meaning of your life if you don’t know yourself.” I underlined that idea in my mind immediately because it is so connected to what I believe and teach. We cannot connect meaningfully with the outer world if we haven't first learned to connect honestly with ourselves. That inner connection is the starting point for intentional transformation.

This is also why self-awareness is essential to leadership. You cannot lead with clarity if you are disconnected from what matters to you. You cannot build a meaningful next chapter if you have not paused long enough to ask if the chapter you are living still fits.

In my own work, I refer to my three-part framework, often talk about the physical, mental, and relational self. These parts of us are not separate from leadership. They shape how we enter a room, handle pressure, listen, respond, and build trust. And the relational self begins with our relationship with ourselves. 

  • Do we know who we are and what we value? 

  • Where are we misaligned? 

  • What we may be afraid to admit? 

Those questions matter because what is happening within us eventually shows up around us.

That inner work is where intentional transformation begins. It is where we stop performing success and start building a life and leadership presence that truly reflects who we are becoming.


Meaning Changes How You Lead

When success is connected to meaning, leadership changes. You stop leading from pressure and start leading from purpose. Instead of measuring every room by whether you were impressive enough, you start asking if you contributed something of value. You stop chasing external validation and begin paying attention to the deeper alignment between who you are, what you say, and how you show up.

This kind of leadership is felt. People may not always have the words for it, but they can sense when a leader is grounded in something deeper than performance. They can sense when your words are connected to conviction, when your confidence is rooted in clarity, and when your presence is anchored in purpose.

A leader disconnected from meaning may still be polished, prepared, and impressive, but something can be missing. A leader connected to meaning brings a different energy into the room. They are not just trying to look the part. They are aligned with the part they are there to play.

Growth Requires the Whole Story

Another idea from Arthur’s book that resonated with me is his emphasis on leaning into the whole of life, including the uncomfortable parts, and allowing those experiences to become part of our growth. I have believed some version of that for a long time, though I often hear it through the voice of my grandmother, and my mother, who often said, “No knowledge is ever wasted.”

That quote has stayed with me throughout my life because I believe it is true. The experiences that challenge us, redirect us, humble us, and stretch us are not wasted if we are willing to learn from them. The career shift, the disappointment, the difficult conversation, the health setback, the closed door, the moment of uncertainty—all of it can become part of the wisdom we carry forward.

For leaders, this matters even more. Growth doesn't come only from the moments that look successful. It also comes from the moments that force us to become more honest, more resilient, more present, and more willing to change. If we only value the polished parts of our lives, we miss the lessons that may be shaping us most deeply.

Building Success That Feels Aligned

So many leaders are asking how to become more effective, more visible, more confident, more influential, and more prepared for the next level. Those are worthy goals. But I invite you to ask a different question: Are you building success that actually means something?

Not success that only looks good from the outside, keeps you busy, but leaves you disconnected. I mean success that feels aligned with your purpose, your values, your voice, and the person you are becoming.

That kind of success requires self-awareness. It takes courage to think differently, question old patterns, and pause long enough to hear what your life may be asking of you now. It also requires action, because meaning is not something we simply think about. We live it through the choices we make, the conversations we have, the work we do, and the way we show up.

If the version of success you once wanted no longer feels like enough, honor that awareness. If you are standing at the edge of a new chapter and wondering what it all means, that may not be a sign that something is wrong. It may be an invitation to build something more true. The question is not only, “What are you building?” The deeper question is, “Does it still reflect who you are becoming?”

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