Imagine a leader who wants their team to contribute more ideas during meetings. They encourage everyone to speak up, emphasize collaboration, and genuinely want to create an environment where people feel heard.
Yet when someone begins to share an idea, the leader interrupts, finishes their sentence, or quickly moves the conversation along. This creates a disconnect between the environment they hope to foster and the message their daily actions send.
We all have ambitions. Maybe you want to become a more confident communicator, strengthen your relationships, take on a bigger leadership role, or feel more comfortable trusting yourself. You might have a clear vision of the person you want to become and the experiences you hope to create.
But how often do you pause to ask yourself if your daily choices are truly moving you closer to that vision?
Throughout my career, I've learned that confident communication, executive presence, and meaningful personal transformation don't happen by accident. They begin with intentional action. Our ambitions become more attainable when we examine the everyday habits, choices, and behaviors that either move us forward or hold us back. Often, it's the smallest, most consistent actions that create the greatest opportunities for growth.
The Distance Between What We Want and What We Practice
Setting a goal gives us direction, but real progress happens when we begin putting our intentions into practice. Consider your own communication skills. You might attend workshops, read books, or study the techniques of great speakers. Those are valuable investments, but the real test comes in everyday interactions.
Do you listen with the intention of understanding rather than simply waiting for your turn to speak?
Can you express disagreement clearly and respectfully?
Are you willing to ask questions when something isn't clear?
These moments reveal more than what you’ve learned; they reveal what you’ve put into practice and are often your biggest opportunities for growth. You may evaluate yourself by your intentions, knowing what you hope to achieve and why it matters. Others, however, experience your actions. They notice how you respond, whether you follow through, and how consistently your behaviors reflect the values you express.
Confidence Is Something We Practice
I hear about confidence often in my work. Many people want to speak with more authority, share their ideas comfortably, or walk into important rooms without second-guessing themselves. But confidence rarely shows up before we take on a challenge. More often, it grows as we step forward and gain experience.
If you want to become more confident expressing your opinions, perhaps the next step is contributing an idea in a meeting rather than waiting until you're completely certain everyone will agree. If you're working on trusting your judgment, maybe it's making a thoughtful decision without asking five different people to validate it first.
Confidence grows when you intentionally give yourself opportunities to build it. Each time you speak up, trust your judgment, or take a step outside your comfort zone, you create evidence for yourselfe that you’re capable of more than you may have believed.
Your Communication Reveals More Than You Realize
What fascinates me about communication is how much happens beyond our words. We communicate through our attention, our responses, our body language, and how we treat others in everyday moments. Sometimes these behaviors support the message we want to send. Other times, they reveal something different.
For example, imagine someone who regularly says that relationships are their greatest priority, but consistently checks their phone while spending time with people they care about.
This behavior may not come from bad intentions, but illustrates how our habits shape the experience we create for others. Executive presence isn't simply what people see when you're standing in front of a room. It's what people experience when they're interacting with you.
Developing a stronger presence requires being intentional about how you show up in everyday conversations.
Are you truly listening, or are you already thinking about what you'll say next?
Are you asking questions that encourage meaningful dialogue?
Are you giving others your full attention, especially when they're sharing something important?
These seemingly small behaviors shape how others experience you. Over time, they build credibility, strengthen trust, and foster more meaningful relationships.
When Your Ambitions Change, Your Habits May Need to Change Too
Another aspect of personal growth deserves more attention: sometimes the behaviors that helped us succeed in an earlier chapter of life no longer support the person we're becoming.
Perhaps you've built a successful career by always being available, saying yes to every opportunity, and putting tremendous pressure on yourself to perform. Those habits might have helped you develop valuable skills and establish your reputation.
But what happens when your priorities evolve? What if you're now trying to set healthier boundaries, spend more meaningful time with your family, or build a stronger sense of confidence that doesn't depend on constantly proving yourself?
Sometimes, personal growth requires us to question not just our habits, but the expectations we've placed on ourselves.
Bringing Greater Intention Into Everyday Life
So how do you begin aligning your ambitions with your daily actions? Start by identifying what you want to experience differently and the specific behaviors that can help you get there.
If your ambition is to become a more confident communicator, what would that look like in your week? Maybe you prepare more intentionally for an important conversation, share an idea you've been holding back, or practice speaking with clarity instead of filling every pause.
One exercise I encourage you to try is choosing a single ambition and reflecting on three questions:
What do I really want to change, and why does it matter to me? Be specific about why it matters and what you hope will change.
What am I currently doing that supports or works against it? Look at your recurring habits, decisions, and responses without judging yourself.
What's one action I can practice consistently over the next week? Choose something realistic enough to put into practice immediately.
You don't need to make sweeping changes to create meaningful progress. Sometimes, one intentional choice can shift the direction of a conversation, strengthen a relationship, or challenge a belief that has been holding you back. The key is to remain aware of the choices you're making and whether they're moving you toward the person you want to become.
As you consider your ambitions for the months ahead, look beyond the goals themselves. Consider how you want to lead, communicate, connect with others, and experience your life. Then ask yourself: Are the choices I'm making today reflecting the person I want to become?
Because ultimately, transformation isn't just about envisioning a different future. It's about intentionally creating it through the way you live each day.
If you enjoyed this blog post, here are some other resources you might enjoy:
My book, Dare To Own You: Taking Your Authenticity and Dreams Into Your Next Chapter, the winner of two Feathered Quill Book awards, a Book Excellence award, and recommended by Forbes in 2022 as “a teaching memoir”.
My work as a keynote speaker, executive coach and communication expert. You can read more about more of my services here.
My podcast, the "Live Your Best Life with Liz Brunner" podcast: An award-winning and internationally streamed show that highlights powerful stories of re-creation and reinvention from guests who have taken their life experiences, and used that knowledge to create their “next chapters” and live their best lives.
Interested in Taking Yourself or Your Executive Team to the Next Level?
Brunner Communications assists high-profile individuals and organizations in sharpening and developing top level business communication, executive presence, and public speaking skills. Our passionate team provides one-on-one executive business coaching, and runs specialized business workshops. Through customized training, clients learn the necessary skills to become great communicators and build a marketable reputation.